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Saturday, April 20, 2024

How do we have a Darts & Laurels today, while we still grieve over those we lost in Orlando, while we painstakingly hold our breath for those still in recovery. The rest of the country can move on, but how do we? It happened right here at home. How did those in Newtown, Connecticut, or Charleston, South Carolina, move on when mass murder devastated their lives?

We’re seeing Pulse be weaved into a variety of political narratives, all of which deface the issue from the lives forever changed after Sunday morning. We do, as a matter of fact, need to discuss the issues at hand if we want to prevent another San Bernardino, Columbine or Pulse from happening.

However, in terms of moving forward together, we at the Alligator wish to take a cue not from those who would play political calculus with Pulse, but rather, those with a true stake in what happened. Carlos Perez, who opened an Orlando vigil Sunday, said, “I don’t want this to be the end of anything, but the beginning of us staying together as a community and helping one another.”

So, as a means of staying together, expressing love and sharing the gift that is life and joy with you all, we’d like to present you with this moment of relief.

Darts & Laurels

Is there anything better than blasting Adele in your car as you speed down the highway? The singer and songwriter caught some headlines recently for calling out critics. During a performance Saturday night, a fan-shot video caught Adele saying, “Some dickhead tried to say that my voice was not me on the record. Dude, suck my dick.“ We know: This is truly devastating.

One of mainstream music’s quintessential experts on heart-rending love and loss, a true role model for young women around the world, is nothing more than a… totally normal 28-year-old woman who drops the “D” every now and again. In fact, after dedicating years of her life to divulging her darkest secrets and serving as a sort of benevolent all-mother to those undergoing heartbreak, Adele may have quite a few profanities wound up inside of her ready to blow.

Be ready next year for her latest singles: “I Can’t Make You Love Me… Dickhead” and “Hello… Suck My Dick.” We give a laurel to Adele for sticking to her guns and standing up for her voice. Though, in light of the new Red Hot Chili Peppers album to come out Friday, we would have preferred you said “Suck My Kiss.”

In gamer news, Bethesda Game Studios announced a launching of “Skyrim.” Just when we thought our society had enough of a problem getting people out of the house and engaged in physical activity, the ultimate temptress that is Skyrim re-emerges in a new form to pin us down in front of a screen and steal hours of our lives from us: a dart to this new development for further forcing us innocent gamers into an endless cycle of all-nighters and procrastinating responsibilities.

There, a brief moment of relief. Hopefully you can share a few chuckles from that. We can move on from Orlando, but the way we move forward is by being there for one another.

This is no simple task. Tolerance and empathy aren’t just words — they’re commitments. And yet, so many in our community have already committed themselves wholeheartedly through their words and actions. We’ve taken the first step, together. Now, we must finish the lap, as one community, one Orlando, one pulse.

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