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Friday, April 19, 2024

Column: Be Ted Cruz, not Bernie Sanders or Elizabeth Warren

As the sole conservative columnist of the Alligator, I bravely lead my “wolf pack of one” each week to advocate a conservative point of view and dispute my liberal colleagues in the opinions section.

I’ll gladly use this column to perform my latter role. Last week, an editorial told students, “Don’t be a Ted Cruz.” Of course, bashing Sen. Cruz, R-Texas, is nothing new on this campus. Although Gov. Jeb Bush, R-Fla., is my first choice, Cruz is my very, very strong second.

Naturally, I was very dismayed reading the editorial, but I couldn’t say I was surprised. And I was certainly not surprised reading this in the piece: “Here at the Alligator, we’re often accused of being a bastion of frightful liberal bias… We’re also aware that some believe we let liberal politicians in the U.S. — if such a thing, Sen. Bernie Sanders, I-Vt., and Sen. Elizabeth Warren, D-Ma., excepted, even truly exists — off the hook for their transgressions, reserving our vitriol solely for conservative politicians and persons of importance.”

The jesting editorial goes on to say students should not strive to be like Ted Cruz because his undergraduate and law school classmates didn’t think he had a very good personality. 

Even his former roommates don’t support his presidential run! Because of these clearly non-trivial reasons, students should forget Cruz and support someone else. Kids, “Don’t be a Ted Cruz.”

For some reason, I don’t think the editorial’s arguments are persuasive. I think being a Ted Cruz is extremely enviable, but let me first attack the article’s argument.  

Sticking with the not-being-surprised theme of this column, I’m not surprised that students at an extremely liberal college, Princeton University, and an extremely liberal law school, Harvard Law School, would find Ted Cruz, a very vocal conservative, disagreeable. If I was a liberal student at those schools, I wouldn’t like having my arguments constantly being dismantled by the champion debater.

The fact that Type-A, Harvard-educated lawyers don’t like Cruz makes me like Cruz more.  

As for the disgruntled roommate, I for one can very confidently say I am probably not the best roommate. Like Cruz, my roommates are probably not in my future base of political support. But then again, who among us is a fantastic roommate?

Now, here’s why you should be a Ted Cruz.

You should strive to be the best. Cruz is a remarkably driven individual. As the son of a Cuban immigrant who spoke little to no English, Cruz earned his spot at Princeton. There, he was a champion debater. He then went to the illustrious Harvard Law School where he was deemed a “terrific student” and one of “the top students” of the extremely liberal professor Alan Dershowitz. 

Cruz became a law clerk to the chief justice of the U.S., which is not an easy feat! Later, he bested an establishment candidate in a Texas Senate race and is at war with both Democrats and Republicans. While being attacked by both sides, he stays ideologically pure and resilient in the face of intense criticism, especially from college newspapers that attack not only his policies but his personality.

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I say very emphatically, “Be a Ted Cruz.”

But don’t be an Elizabeth Warren. Oh no. Don’t be a person who made a career of fighting income inequality but lives in a million-dollar-plus home, has a net worth of about $9 million and received a nearly-half-a-million-dollar salary from her Harvard Law gig. She’s doing her part in the war to fight income inequality.      

And certainty don’t be a Bernie Sanders. No, no. Don’t be a guy who praised Fidel Castro — you know, our democratic and saintly friend in Cuba. Completely forget the fact that he’s a murderous thug who killed thousands of his own countrymen.

Students, don’t be a Warren or Sanders.

Students, be driven, be smart and be bold. Be a Ted Cruz. And don’t let your roommates hold you back.  

Michael Beato is a UF political science senior. His column runs on Mondays.

 

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