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Tuesday, February 27, 2024

Well, it's finally here. Our calendars may say it's Wednesday, but right about now it sure feels like a Friday. This being the last issue of the spring semester and the last day of classes - though everyone seems to be too busy headed to the library for "exams" and "term papers" - we've decided to lighten it up a bit. C'mon, you know you're not really going to use both of those reading days, anyway. So grab a lounge chair by the pool, pop open a cold one and start thinking about summer. It's with bittersweet nostalgia that we here at the Darts & Laurels department compose our semester-ending edition of Darts & Laurels.

It seemed that no edition of Darts and Laurels this spring was complete without some variation of a we-can't-believe-they-were-actually-voted-into-office DART going to the Florida Legislature. Whether it was state Sen. Mike Haridopolos embellishing some of his qualifications to be hired in a questionable move at UF or the majority of the state Senate voting for a constitutional amendment that would do away with the Board of Governors, we can't say that the Legislature has served Florida's students well. The state education system seems to be moving backward instead of forward, especially since it appears that we will soon have an elected education commissioner.

So when our politicians weren't busy arguing about pressing issues, like the legality of truck accessories that resemble male reproductive organs or the semantics of teaching evolution, the state of higher education continued to face a situation that feels a lot like standing on the edge of a very steep cliff -without a safety net.

In keeping with government disappointments, a clearly-you-have-no-idea-or-just-don't-care-about-what-students-want DART goes to Student Government. Not only did the SG-appointed UF Supreme Court decide that an online voting system would be unconstitutional this semester even though a majority of students expressed a desire for the change, SG also wasted time passing meaningless resolutions and arguing over petty election violations. Despite student concerns over voter coercion at fraternity and sorority houses using "I voted" stickers, many in SG continue to defend the decision to not allow online voting. And it goes without saying that allowing a senator with questionable addresses on various forms to continue to represent a district goes beyond the realm of incompetence.

That's not to say that every thing SG did was completely useless. We hand out a good-job-and-good-luck making some tangible improvements for the Student Body and the UF community as a whole. These included instituting Global Positioning Systems on Regional Transit System buses by February, extending the hours of Library West during final exams, adding more recycling bins on campus and approving legislation from the Student Senate to create a graduate student bill of rights.

And finally, after the Pennsylvania primary, the kick-off to primary season seems like eons ago since we're already feeling the effects of election fatigue: pure apathy. So we have no choice but to issue a last what-happened-to-promises-of-unity-and-hope DART to the Democratic Party for perpetuating one of the most divisive primary races in recent memory. Whether it was Clinton's 3 a.m. commercial or the continuous reel of Obama's pastor making controversial statements, there's one thing we do know: whomever the nominee happens to be, we're over it already.

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