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Saturday, January 22, 2022

Dear freshmen,

I hear you’re trying to decide on a college.

Well, you’ve probably heard that there are three parts to college: studying, socializing and sleeping.

We can have two, but none of us can have all three.

Let me help you plan your choices.

If you want to study and sleep, then join the Fisher School of Accounting. Only 12 percent of grades in this college are A’s or A-’s.

Or, to put it another way, the accounting school gives, per student, fewer than a sixth of the A’s that the education college gives.

In other words, it gives fewer than a fourth of the A’s given on average at UF — 51 percent of the grades are A’s.

But, I hear accountants make a lot of money.

Speaking of the College of Education, 78 percent of the grades earned in this college are A’s or A-’s.

This means if you’re an average student, then you will get eight A’s for every 10 classes you take. The average GPA for courses in the education college is a 3.63.

The highest GPA for any college is the College of Public Health and Health Professions at a 3.64.

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You see the trade-off?

In college, you get a higher GPA. When you graduate, you get a lower salary.

And when you meet recruiters who are trying to convince you to sign your life away for a free Army, Navy or Air Force T-shirt, remember one thing.

The lowest grade point average per grade of any college is the Division of Military Science at 2.20, or a C average.

And maybe those premed students can start letting up on nursing majors.

The College of Nursing has a 2.31 GPA, while the two colleges that house most premed students — the College of Agricultural and Life Sciences and the College of Liberal Arts and Sciences — both have an average GPA higher than 3.2..

Well, does that mean the college is harder or that the students are not as smart?

If I wanted to go into some medical profession, I’d get a degree in the public health college.

But that’s just me.

I like taking the easy route.

I’m not saying this means anything about how hard each college is, but if you want to keep Bright Futures, then maybe you should reconsider if you want to be an accountant or a school teacher.

Andrew Pantazi is a journalism senior.

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