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Tuesday, April 23, 2024

"Fight Club"

"Fight Club" bleeds testosterone with every frame.

Violent, anarchic and mind-boggling, "Fight Club" is the film equivalent of the psychosomatic nature of man. Explosions? Check. Car Crashes? Check. A man shooting himself through his cheek? Check.

This film also has one of the best twists of the last few decades. Most writers seem to feel that film versions of their books take away from the original story, but author Chuck Palahniuk found the film version "to be improvement on his novel."

Manliest Moment: When Edward Norton punches Jarod Leto's face into oblivion.

"Rudy"

There are three times in a man's life when it is acceptable to cry: the birth of his child, a UF loss to FSU and the end of "Rudy."

While it doesn't have the standard formula of explosions, boobs and more explosions, it does have the next manliest thing: personal triumph through sport, in this case football.

Beware, men. Rudy is not a film to watch with your lady friends unless you want them to know you actually have those things called ... feelings.

Manliest Moment: "Rudy! Rudy! Rudy!"

"Bad Boys II"

Not too many films can boast a sequel stronger than the original. "Bad Boys II" is an exception to that rule.

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The Michael Bay-directed thriller boasts all of his trademarks. You've got your ridiculous car chases, excessive explosions and plenty of unnecessary destruction. Pile on the comedic partnership of Will Smith and Martin Lawrence and set the film in beautiful Miami and you have pure man-gold.

In my opinion, "Bad Boys II" is one of the most underrated action-comedy films in history. Nothing beats a gunfight on South Beach.

Manliest Moment: When Reggie attempts to pick up Marcus' daughter and "Uncle Mike" gets involved.

"300"

At the height of the comic-book craze, "300" drop-kicked its way onto the screen. Starring the manliest of men, Gerard Butler, the film is essentially about 300 kick-ass Spartans kicking ass.

When the film isn't attempting a story, it is essentially a montage of insanely ripped men killing crazy monster things. And that is awesome.

Watching a sweaty Spartans weave in between enemies while decapitating them in slow motion will imbue enough "manspiration" for even the tiniest of men to rip off their shirts and start a long, soaring battle roar.

Manliest Moment: "This! Is! Spartaaaaaa!!!!" Followed by a chest-kick into an endless pit.

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