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Saturday, April 20, 2024

Welcome back, readers. Welcome home. We hope you enjoyed that little sliver of vacation. How did it come and go so quickly? It seems just yesterday we were in the heap of finals week, shamelessly praying to the gods to save our GPAs. No matter: time to trudge on through another season of classes. Treasure this semester, dear readers. It looks as though it may be our last.

In the two-and-a-half weeks since we at the Alligator took off, the world seemed to take a turn toward catastrophe. Both the half-lizard, half-wife-elbowing-theocrat and everyone’s favorite little league coach dropped out of the race for the White House last week, leaving America’s drunk uncle with a direct path to the Republican nomination. The one thing countless upon countless pundits assured us would never happen has, sure enough, landed right at our feet. A Washington Post columnist, Dana Milbank, even wrote an article back in October entitled, “Trump will lose, or I will eat this column.” Well, we know what he’s going to be stuffing his turkey with come Thanksgiving.

Even now, we’re hearing the same old song. “Oh, he won’t last in the general election. Oh, Hillary Clinton’s lead against him is widening.” In actuality, averages of recent polls reflect Clinton’s lead over Donald Trump narrowing quickly, and some polling even reflects Trump as leading Clinton. Not to mention her obscenely high unfavorability rating, 55 percent, and the fact that she currently faces civil and FBI-led criminal charges, both based on her use of a private email server while secretary of state.Things are really not looking good in politics right now.

Who’s supposed to protect us? Even The Avengers are fighting one another for crying out loud. Batman and Superman are still recovering from their recent brawl, and the X-Men are about to deal with their own Apocalypse. Beyonce’s too busy sipping her lemonade to get the ladies in formation. We don’t even have Prince and the Revolution anymore. It’s times like these when we start seriously reconsidering where things are headed. Are we going to make it out of this in one piece? Well fear not, ladies and gentlemen. We know things seem a little crazy, and you may not be altogether happy with classes starting back up again, but there are still remarkably beautiful things in this world. Our antidote to trodden times and faint hopes is the cheapest yet greatest drug of them all: good music. Radiohead and the Red Hot Chili Peppers: This is your salvation.

On Thursday, the Red Hot Chili Peppers released news that their new album “The Getaway” will land June 17 and also uploaded their new single “Dark Necessities.” Let there be no mistake: If you didn’t have any dark necessities before, you’re bound to discover a few after getting down to this new groove. Moreover, Radiohead shook the world by suddenly dissolving their social media accounts and releasing two new tracks last week, topping it off Sunday evening by dropping their new album “A Moon Shaped Pool.” Listening to it is a near-religious experience.

So take solace, dear readers. Classes may be back, and each day’s headlines may speak of impending disaster, but our musicians are here to offer sanctuary to the faint of heart. So let’s take this semester by storm, together — or at least make it through these extended hours for Summer classes.

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