Imagine two fairly built girls returning from lacrosse practice at Southwest Recreation Center. They exit the gym with another male student and carry their heavy equipment toward the bus stop. Upon reaching the bus stop, the weather takes a turn for the worse and rain starts pouring down on the girls.
We know, we know - the Alligator has broken your heart before.
You're late for school. The time is 9:30 a.m. and you've just pulled onto Gale Lemerand Drive, hoping to find a parking space in the commuter lot. After searching for fifteen minutes, you give up and head to the O'Connell Center lot. Sorry, no luck - this lot is full, too. Despite being a bad way to start the day, thousands of students face this situation. The question is, how do we remedy the problem?
I know, I know - UF President Bernie Machen has made resolving UF's debt problem his calling card. But despite a cost-cutting task force, a hiring freeze and a tuition plan without immediate short-term benefits, one solution to the problem has not been addressed.
As a college student, I welcome almost any chance to celebrate. Just a few days ago I celebrated the four-month anniversary of the end of spring classes. My apologies if I forgot to invite you, but don't worry. We had so much fun, we're going to do it again next month. I'll Facebook you.
Is it possible to pinpoint the moment when Americans decided boardroom decisions stem solely from deception and derision? Did the Enron debacle of 2004 set tongues ablaze, or have we long had reasons to distrust corporate America?
BEducation is one of the few things a person is willing to pay for and not get,C William Lowe Bryan once said.
UF is bursting at the seams with new opportunities for every type of student. There is a colorful cornucopia of clubs to join, an endless sea of parties to crash, a large number of athletic-based activities to avoid and a ginormous stack of coupons to treasure - all of which are great if you are a fearless person who isn?t afraid to fall flat on your face diving for a Frisbee.
On Monday, the Gainesville City Commission voted to approve the location for a new homeless shelter that will be part of a joint effort to end homelessness between the city and Alachua County.
I heard through the Greekvine that the Greek community needs a makeover. Apparently some silly television show filled with sex and sex and beer - oh my! - bruised their peach-like reputation. I put together some slogans for them. Here's my top sorority slogan: "To-ga, to-ga, to-gather under the bonds of sisterhood is a wonderful idea." It says, "We're a little formal, but we're here for the party, too." They can thank me later.
They meander across campus, maps held high in front of their faces, barely knowing where they are going in the next four minutes - let alone the next four years. Yes, UF's newest batch of fresh-faced, doe-eyed freshmen is here, and they are, for the most part, clueless.
After spending the summer interning in Washington D.C., I?ve learned that politics are about as useful as hanging chads, and congressional interns are more stuck up than their do-nothing bosses on Capitol Hill.
As we?ve all realized, perhaps too late, summer is ending, and the summer driving season is coming to a complete stop. Considering the price of gas, that?s probably a good thing. But long after our collective finances have recovered from the petrol outlays of summer 2007, we?ll be hearing about gas and more energy issues from a whole host of Democratic and Republican presidential candidates.
Recently, U.S. News and World Report ranked UF as the 17th best public university in the country. Last year, UF was ranked No. 13 by the report, and UF President Bernie Machen was spearheading an aggressive campaign to get UF into the Top 10. Machen's obsession with the rankings was almost nauseating. Now Machen says, "The reality is, our change in the academic rankings is insignificant."
Every 15 seconds, a hard drive crashes. This summer, I was fortunate enough to experience it firsthand. Twice.
Warning - this column may contain absurd, random song lyrics. You may be under investigation for illegally downloading music on campus. And wait, you may be one of the students or personnel the Recording Industry Association of America plans to serve with a lawsuit. "I don?t want to lose your love tonight," but UF is one of 58 universities nationwide receiving these pre-litigation letters from the RIAA as a part of its "education and deterrence campaign." Mo? illegal downloading, mo? problems.
Here at the Alligator, we love to yak about how old our newspaper is.
Solutions by The State News
