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Saturday, March 21, 2026

Opinion

Florida Alligator
Opinion

Darts & Laurels

You could best describe the current mood at the Department of Darts and Laurels as ambivalent. Summer classes have finally come to an end, and we're stuck somewhere in between nostalgia and euphoria.


Florida Alligator
Opinion

Bush, Cheney deserve impeachment

Given their Nixon-esque polling numbers, it's safe to say that President George W. Bush and Vice President Dick Cheney are not exactly the most popular pair to grace 1600 Pennsylvania Ave. In fact, only about 25 percent of people think our feckless leader is doing a good job. Incidentally, the same percentage of people predicted that the second coming of Jesus would occur in 2007. I've got a hunch that there's a lot of overlap in those two groups.


Florida Alligator
Opinion

Guns on campus would prevent tragedies

About a month ago, Florida's new "guns-at-work" law went into effect. The law allows employees with valid concealed weapons licenses to keep their guns in their cars while at work.


Florida Alligator
Opinion

Cover Florida won’t cover Floridians

There are 3.7 million Floridians without health insurance. That means if you are under the age of 65, there's about a 1 in 4 chance that a serious illness would drive you into bankruptcy. But fear not - Gov. Charlie Crist has a plan. He calls it Cover Florida, and with it, he hopes to reduce the number of uninsured by offering them affordable premiums.


Florida Alligator
Opinion

Deregulation threatens democracy

A recent letter to the editor by Kyle Morgan made outrageous claims about economic regulation. Mr. Morgan obviously has a very tenuous hold on reality if he thinks that more deregulation is the answer to our economic woes when in fact, the opposite is true.


Florida Alligator
Opinion

Darts & Laurels

The final countdown has begun. One week until summer break. The beginning of the end of summer classes means that tailgating and tackle football are on the horizon. And while we at the Department of Darts and Laurels can't wait to see Tebow and Co. run all over the "competition," we're determined to conclude the summer with the patented satirical smack-downs that you've come to expect from these pages. As summer classes wind down to a close, we hope you've enjoyed the summer edition of what has become something of an institution (no, we're not presumptuous at all) in The Gator Nation. We thank you for humoring us as we've offered scathing indignation and effusive gratitude, not usually in equal portions, in reaction to the news of the week. So without further ado, we offer the second-to-last summer installment of …


Florida Alligator
Opinion

Media not biased in favor of Obama

If one goes by the adage "all press is good press," then Mr. Simmons' column is correct: Sen. Barack Obama has been receiving more media coverage than Sen. John McCain since the end of the primary season.


Florida Alligator
Opinion

Savage comments taken out of context

This is in regard to the Dart handed out to conservative radio talk show host Michael Savage in the July 24 edition of the Alligator for comments he made about autistic children.


Florida Alligator
Opinion

Misplaced Priorities: Fla. universities should shun political hires

As a result of the worst budget crisis in state history, Florida's colleges and universities have been forced to leave vacant positions unfilled, eliminate or incapacitate various degree programs and hand out pink slips to faculty members in order to cope with the state Legislature's refusal to fully fund higher education.


Florida Alligator
Opinion

Mainstream media fuels Obamamania

If your experience has been anything like mine, you've been surrounded by Obamamania for the better part of the past several months. It's not related, as much as you might expect, to spending most of the day on a college campus, where support for the master orator is pervasive and contagious. Rather, like most Americans, I've been bombarded with thinly veiled propaganda from the mainstream media in support of the hope-monger for longer than I care to remember.


Florida Alligator
Sports

Ranking the SEC coaches

There won't be any more opportunities to giggle at former Mississippi coach Ed Orgeron and his gruff Southern accent. If you want to see what I'm talking about, just search for his Hummer ad on YouTube.


Florida Alligator
Opinion

Party on, Gators

We're not exactly sure what it is about Gainesville that predisposes The Gator Nation to excellence. Maybe it's something in the water (or in this case, the amber-colored beverages routinely found in plastic cups). At any rate, UF is once again the reigning national champion - this time we're No. 1 in partying.


Florida Alligator
Opinion

Give CHOICES program chance to succeed

In his July 22 column, Joshua Simmons illogically reasoned that low enrollment numbers in the CHOICES program could only mean that the program is "exactly the wrong model of health care" for Alachua County's working poor. What Mr. Simmons has failed to consider is that low enrollment numbers may be a symptom of other problems, such as citizens simply being unaware of the program. Many social programs take a few years to get off the ground. This seems to be the case with CHOICES.


Florida Alligator
Opinion

Deregulation led to economic hangover

The fact that most of us don't hold a mortgage, work a full-time job or have kids to support makes it pretty easy to ignore the current economic crisis. It doesn't help that for all but a few of us, economics is more boring than an episode of "Book TV" on C-SPAN 3 featuring an interview with Alan Greenspan.


Florida Alligator
Opinion

Darts & Laurels

When it hasn't been raining, it's been hot as Hades in the center of The Gator Nation this week. As the dog days of summer sprint onward at break-neck speed, we at the Department of Darts and Laurels would like to advise our loyal readers to stay hydrated and keep cool. Heat stroke shouldn't be taken lightly and neither should this week's blazing edition of …


Florida Alligator
Opinion

Alligator misunderstands “time horizon”

It appears that the Alligator editorial board has had some difficulty in understanding the difference between a "timetable" and a "general time horizon." I would like to make an attempt to clarify these terms.


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