I used to abhor the expression “the road to Hell is paved with good intentions.” If there’s a Hell, we’re probably living in it already, and why fault people for their good intentions?
One of the challenges for us in assigning current events with a dart or a laurel is the fact that there is just so much to talk about. Economies across the globe may be in recession, but we never seem to run short on our supply of ridiculousness. Experts are saying its market value is at an all-time high. So, with all of the ups and downs in recent world news, we’d like to bring you a more international segment: “Dartos y Laurel-schteinem?” We digress.
Presumptive Republican presidential candidate Donald Trump has a huge electoral problem looming on the horizon, and it seems he and many of his supporters either do not want to acknowledge it or would rather dismiss it as a non-issue. The problem is Trump does not seem to do well with a diverse general election constituency.
Hi, everybody. My name is Zachary Lee. I’ll be one of your columnists this Summer. You can find my column here in the Alligator every Tuesday. This being my first official column (you may recognize me from some politically-charged guest columns in past semesters or some crappy satirical pieces two years ago), I feel like I should introduce myself to you. I am majoring in philosophy and minoring in sustainability studies. I like peanut butter, my roommate’s dog and the satisfying crunch of walking on dead leaves. I don’t like the beach, adult men who wear Ed Hardy clothing products or Smirnoff Ice.
Welcome back, readers. Welcome home. We hope you enjoyed that little sliver of vacation. How did it come and go so quickly? It seems just yesterday we were in the heap of finals week, shamelessly praying to the gods to save our GPAs. No matter: time to trudge on through another season of classes. Treasure this semester, dear readers. It looks as though it may be our last.
Goodbyes have never been my strong suit.
We live in a world full of myths. Never mind the tales of a big, green, gamma-radiated “Avenger” who, for some reason, seems to break through every article of clothing except his shorts, or the tales of a “hell week” that drain all happiness and restfulness from students as they descend in a Walking Dead-like fashion upon their neighborhood libraries and Starbucks, indiscriminately feasting on raw study guides and fresh coffee.
There’s something about the end of the Spring semester that provokes a certain type of introspection. Daily rituals, people and locations take on a deeper meaning as you assess how far you’ve come and where the hell you actually plan on going. It’s a discomforting mixture of nostalgia for another year gone by and the hesitant acknowledgement that time will continue to move at this swift pace. Everything you encounter becomes a symbol of change as friends continue to graduate and you’re left with a completely different Gainesville than the one you first encountered so long ago. In reality, these thoughts are most likely a thinly veiled attempt at procrastination, but that doesn’t make them any less profound.
So, it’s my final column of the semester. I’d say it was a pleasure writing for you all, but that’d be a lie. Y’all are kind of pretentious, to be honest. It makes me uncomfortable to be around you.
Animal welfare is an issue often overlooked by a vast majority of people. When consuming animal products, individuals often don’t realize the suffering and pain that results from the industry. As a society, it is important for us to understand the origins of the products we consume and to place economic pressure on companies that exhibit blatant disregard for animal suffering. Together, we have the ability to effect positive change in the industry by manipulating supply and demand, a process that has proven to be tremendously effective thus far. The recent policy shifts of the Carnival Corporation and Royal Caribbean Cruises are just two examples of the power consumers have to sway the policies of large corporations.
Although Wednesday is the last day of classes, it doesn’t seem long ago we were beginning the Fall semester and kicking off the school year. It may be time for students to say goodbye to a lot, but at least there is one thing we can all look forward to leaving behind: on-campus dining.
"Because sex without it isn’t sex.
Dear readers, this beautiful Monday marks our collective descent into the abyss. Many of us students find ourselves waking up to the academic reality we’ve been trying to ignore since Spring Break. Papers, finals, deadlines: It all comes down to these next two weeks.
Picture this: You’re in one of your political science, history or philosophy classes. Things are going well until the professor asks a politically charged question to the class. You know you’re in the extreme ideological minority, because the professor and 98 percent of the class hold the same beliefs.
Normally, Fridays are reserved for Darts & Laurels. But today, the Alligator would like to dedicate this editorial to the survivors of sexual assault, the victim advocates, nurses and detectives who work to heal survivors.
I’m starting to believe maturation means admitting how truly childish you are. If there’s any part of life in which maturation occurs the most, it has to be college.
Universities are the breeding grounds of tomorrow. Here, students, faculty and staff alike immerse themselves in a culture that obsesses about our well-being. Universities are consequently a microcosmic nation in themselves, filled with pockets of people and thickets of thinkers, that so directly emulate the world around them. Said plainly: Like apples falling from trees, students don’t fall far from their countries.
These past few weeks have seen an almost unprecedented movement in state governments across the country attacking LGBTQ+ rights in one way or another. The failed Georgia and successfully passed North Carolina and Mississippi religious liberty bills have caused widespread debate and condemnation across the country. It isn’t new; the respective “bathroom” and “wedding cake” wars have been playing out in state and local governments for the past couple years and have been evermore present since the Supreme Court’s marriage equality decision last summer.
"Floridians have been encouraged to believe that government could take care of us. But government always takes more than it gives back.” —Rick Scott, in his 2011 State of the State address.
It’s a beautiful world and a wonderful life, but these are also times of great civil unrest. Tensions between civilians and police, institutionalized racism and movements like “Occupy Wall Street” and “Fight for $15” are sobering reminders of such unrest. In light of all this strife, you’d think when a noteworthy example of nonviolent civil disobedience arises, there’d be relentless cable news coverage of it, right? Right?
Solutions by The State News
