Tim Tebow, take a seat - the Editorial Board has a new hero.
He's - dare we say - a Republican. Enter United States House Rep. Cliff Stearns stage left.
In just a mildly more important matter than a missed class or four, Stearns petitioned U.S. House Speaker Nancy Pelosi to accommodate his schedule with aspirations of attending the BCS National Championship Game on Thursday.
With hopes that Stearns could work on his tan and rub elbows with the likes of Percy Harvin and co. down in Miami, the Ocala congressman kindly inquired to Pelosi if she would push the voting times on Thursday to a much more BCS-palatable Thursday morning.
Can we fault the man for wanting to look good in high definition on C-SPAN?
Stealing a page from the Bernie Machen playbook for how to lose friends and alienate people, Pelosi pulled the plug on Stearns' weekend jaunt that undoubtedly would have included stops to South Beach hot spots like Mansion and Club Madonna.
The Editorial Board feels for you, Cliff.
As the masses of Gators fans descend upon Miami or stay local to enjoy what will surely be a historic Gainesville evening, Stearns is no different - a victim of an unapologetic overseer clearly lacking any foresight.
But as stuffy as D.C. may appear, there is no s hortage of bars that should provide Stearns the necessary libations to enjoy his evening.
We all joke about how success at UF is something we can take for granted, but who knows the next time the football team will be competing on such a grand stage for the ultimate in bragging rights?
While tickets to Thursday's game appear scarce, two decades in Congress clearly reveal that Stearns is not some freshly-minted politico looking to exploit his newfound status.
The man is simply a fan at heart who knows that the key to a well-rounded life is balancing his obligations in Washington and rooting for the Gators.
And even though he lumped other Florida and Oklahoma congressmen into his request - whose signatures were mysteriously absent from Stearns' memo - we can't fault him for thinking of his fellow football fans come Thursday night.
The Editorial Board applauds Stearns as a champion for fun in a time in which pessimism spreads across America nearly as fast as Brandon Spikes will return a Sam Bradford offering to the house for a quick pick six.
Let us take solace in the fact that UF students no longer seem ludicrous for expecting a schedule change to accommodate the "outlandish" request of a repercussion-free trip to Miami.
For all we know, Pelosi probably snubbed Stearns solely based on his party affiliation.
Hey Bernie, what's your excuse?
The Editorial Board would hardly be shocked if word out of Washington, D.C., reveals Pelosi to be MIA come oh, say early evening on Thursday.
Not to mention if she's seen boarding an orange and blue plane as the guest of honor of you-know-who.
