Remember when you were kid and playing with toys was pretty much the best thing ever?
Action figures, Barbies, Legos, whatever - toys were the jam, the catalysts that temporarily blew your mind as they transported you into another fantasy world a million times better than reality.
Then you grew up.
Luckily, we've now reached an age where the realm of pleasurably naughty playthings enters our lives. Sex toys are convivial indulgences that encourage us to reach our erotic salvations. My friends, there's no need to be embarrassed. Let's discuss.
Honestly, I've never used any toys while messing around and have never felt the need to. But for some, the addition of playful paraphernalia into the bedroom may spark some needed excitement into an otherwise dull sex life.
My advice would be to consult your partner before you even begin to get frisky. The last thing you want to do is surprise him or her with an unexpected visitor once the clothes start flying. Doing so may run the risk of being an instant mood-killer.
For couples, it is important to make sure your sweetheart is comfortable with adding toys to the mix. Make sure they don't say yes just to make you happy. Any uncomfortable feelings will definitely show come game time. Remember that introducing toys might make them feel inadequate, as if the toy was there to make up for their poor performance. So be patient, and respect any qualms they may have.
After asking around, a common concern among students was that a toy might turn into another entity during sex, almost like a third person. As silly as this sounds, partners have to realize that a sex toy is a helper, not a substitute. Pleasure should come from your significant other, not the toy. So before you try to spice things up, remember that toys should be used rarely and with limits.
While many of you were filling your gullets at the tailgates this weekend, my boyfriend and I decided to take a field trip south on 13th Street to X-Mart, Gainesville's finest 24/7 adult supercenter. The mission? To figure out what kinds of sex toys are readily available in Gator City.
Now, I freely admit that I am probably older than most of you readers - 28 - and will also come forward to say that I have visited a fair share of sex shops across the globe. That being said, even I get flustered when I'm in a dominion of smut. Perhaps the immediate confrontation with taboo, exaggerated artificial anatomy and observations of other couples (oh, THAT'S what you two are into, eh?) elicit coyness. Basically, the last thing I want to do when I'm in a sex shop is have sex.
Sensing my bashfulness, my boyfriend modestly began to make light of the atmosphere as we walked the store's perimeter. We contrasted the pros and cons of various dildos, questioned the inclinations shoppers may have toward one butt plug versus another and applauded the cleverness of some toy designs (The Fleshlight for men is pretty remarkable). But feeling like middle-schoolers who finally found their parents' porn stash, he and I left the store amused yet empty-handed.
I mention this story because it is important to realize that shopping for sex toys isn't easy; however, I do believe everyone can find something that captures their sexual attention if the timing is right. Determined to overcome my reluctance, I returned to the store the next day alone. It was then that I spoke to Chrisy, the assured sales associate who filled me in on some best-sellers. Here are three of her recommendations, appropriate for people of any sexual orientation.
Neon Bullet, $15-$25: Small, multi-speed vibrator with remote control. When it comes to this discreet toy, size doesn't matter.
Rabbit, $30-$120: "Sex and the City" made the Rabbit famous for a reason. Anatomically correct vibrators coated in a pliable material and equipped with "ears" for extra stimulation.
Lelo, $75-$200: The Porsche of sex toys. Seamless design. A motor that practically purrs. Sleek, tasteful construction.