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Wednesday, June 07, 2023

No one likes to talk about it, but we all do it: poop.

This everyday (hopefully) bodily function is no problem when you're at home. You feel the urge, so you go to the nearest bathroom and place your bottom on top of that porcelain throne. No noise, no people and all the toilet paper in the world at your disposal. You're comfortable.

But what about those times when you're on campus and nature calls? You can't hold it for another few hours, so you run to the closest bathroom. You open the door slowly and check all the stalls to make sure you're alone. Most of the time you're not, but you don't have enough time to find another place, so you find the cleanest stall and hope you don't make any awkward noises. You're uncomfortable.

Here's a well-researched list of spots around campus to make sure your bathroom experience isn't awkward. In fact, it's to make it as pleasant as possible.

Music Building

Layout: Male and female stall bathrooms

Location: Across the street from Turlington Plaza on the first floor

"It's huge, private and you get to listen to the string concert instruments resonating through the walls," said Matthew Paymer, a chemical-engineering sophomore. "Super peaceful."

Rinker Hall

Layout: Male and female stall bathrooms

Location: Next to Rawlings Hall on the first floor

This building is pretty vacant so there's rarely anyone in the bathroom. It has a lot of stalls and seems new. It's super convenient if you're going to or from the bus stop.

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Shands Basement

Layout: Unisex private bathrooms

Location: Hallway in the basement of Shands, between the Center for Musculoskeletal Pain Research and the Psychology Clinic

"The rooms are pretty spacious," said Megan Johnson, a nursing senior. "The toilets are located in the back corner of the room so your business can't be heard by people passing by. They're awesome!"

Ustler Hall

Layout: Unisex private bathroom

Location: Next to the Student Recreation & Fitness Center

"The bathrooms are generally very clean," said Taissa Morimoto, an anthropology junior. "It is a private bathroom so you can make as much noise as you want, really."

Pugh Hall

(the gold mine of campus bathrooms)

Layout: Male and female private bathrooms, stalls with a private bathroom

Location: Down the road from the Hub. On the top floor for private bathrooms, bottom floor for the stalls with a private area

This is my personal choice. On the top floor, there are male and female private bathrooms. They're huge, very private and clean. There's also a secret poop chamber located on the bottom floor in the regular stall bathrooms. It is located at the back end of the room. It's just as nice as those on the top floor but saves the steps.

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