Darts & Laurels - March 24, 2017

Gainesville does not like to do things halfway, and allergy season is no exception. If you’re one of the lucky few who suffer from seasonal allergies, you are probably familiar with this time of year. If you’re a freshman who did not realize just how potent the pollen levels in Gainesville get, well, you live, you learn, you buy 10 packs of tissues at a time from P.O.D. Market. But hang in there allergy sufferers — only a few more weeks until the air is full of moisture and heat instead of pollen! Meanwhile, tune in to this week’s recap of non-pollen related news with...

Darts & Laurels

Last Friday, conservative superstar Tomi Lahren revealed on “The View” that, contrary to most of her viewers, she is pro-abortion rights. Lahren said she believes in limited government, and that it would be hypocritical of her to believe that the government can intervene with her body. Now, we’re not here to absolve Lahren of everything else she’s said — she’s not getting a laurel. What we’re doing is giving a dart to her network, The Blaze, which suspended her. The Blaze prides itself on being a free-speech zone (no cushy liberal safe spaces here!). But apparently, one of its most popular faces can’t express her own opinions. Just a bit hypocritical, wouldn’t you say? Their definition of free speech, it seems, only applies when that speech agrees with them.

Tonight at the Reitz Union, Young Thug and Demetri Martin are set to perform for Reitz Union Board Entertainment’s fourth annual Big Orange Festival. Although the announcement only came out a few days ago, advance tickets for Young Thug have already been completely handed out. Don’t worry though, dedicated fans can still snatch tickets for Demetri Martin or wait in the standby lines. Young Thug’s performance will also be shown on a screen in the Grand Ballroom for those who don’t make the standby line. We’re giving a laurel to RUB Entertainment, despite a short amount of time since the announcement. Clearly they picked hot acts, as the line for advanced ticketing circled around the North Lawn.

Ivanka Trump now has her own office in the White House, as well as government-issued communication devices. She also has no official title; she’s just going to be a generic adviser to her father on some issues, which may or may not change. It’s all very vague and very unconventional. She won’t be taking a government salary, but she will be using government resources and information, so she still needs to be held up to the same ethical standards as other employees (so we hope, at least). Nothing like this has ever been done before, but then again, there has not really been anything conventional and typical about this administration — what with the First Lady remaining in New York City, and you know, a whole investigation on whether Trump associates colluded with the Kremlin to sway the election in Donald Trump’s favor. Regardless, we’re throwing a dart to this move — if only all our rich daddies could give us coveted office space.

And lastly, we lost a great musician earlier this week. At 90, Chuck Berry passed away in his home due to natural causes. Berry was one of the pioneers of rock ‘n’ roll, helping shape the old roots of rhythm and blues into the quintessential elements of 50s rock ‘n’ roll that we all know so well, among them guitar solos and spectacular showmanship. It’s hard to find a musician who was not directly or indirectly influenced by Berry. He lived a long life, touring until a few years ago. His last studio album is set to be released this summer. He was — is — a legend, making music until the very end. We give this laurel to Chuck Berry, for giving us rhythm, rock ‘n’ roll and just really good music.