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Opinion

Column: My satire fell flat - anybody got a spare?

Apr. 12, 2016

Satire’s funny, right? Well, it can be. Cool, let’s talk about that then. Satire provides commentary through irony — sarcasm, in most cases. And, as I’ve spouted at least twice, irony or “subversion of expectation” is the root of all comedy. Saying one thing and meaning another. Presenting one perception and juxtaposing it with the truth. How much more pretentiously can I describe it? There will always be bigger words in the dictionary; you may as well aim low in that regard.

Opinion

Column: 'Deflategate' and draft picks: Football fanaticism can be taken too far

Apr. 12, 2016

In a lawsuit filed last Tuesday, a small group of New England Patriots fans — not the same patriots from 250 years ago — demanded the NFL return the Patriots’ first-round draft pick. The draft pick was taken from the team by NFL commissioner Roger Goodell before last season in response to the questionably deflated footballs used by the New England team in the 2015 playoffs.

Peter Alonso follows through on a swing during Florida's 10-4 loss to Mississippi State on April 9, 2016, at McKethan Stadium.

University

Emotions run rampant in UF's loss to Mississippi State

By Patrick Pinak | Apr. 11, 2016

In the eighth inning of UF’s 10-4 loss on Saturday, first base coach Lars Davis restrained an enraged Buddy Reed while the centerfielder yelled at umpire Scott Cline.

Kyra Jefferson runs during the 2016 Pepsi Florida Relays on April 1, 2016, at James G. Pressly Stadium.

University

Exceeding Expectations: Kyra Jefferson leaves Florida as one of the all-time greats

By Lauren Staff | Apr. 11, 2016

Kyra Jefferson had never heard of the University of Florida.

Bridgett Caquatto performs on floor during Florida's win over North Carolina on March 11, 2016, in the O'Connell Center.

University

As season comes to close, Jenny Rowland reflects on success

By Alejandro López | Apr. 11, 2016

About seven months ago, Jenny Rowland made a call.

UF’s Brianna Morgan returns a serve during Florida’s win over USF on Jan. 27, 2016, at the Ring Tennis Complex.

Sports

UF women's tennis one win away from SEC title

By Jake Dreilinger | Apr. 11, 2016

Friday’s game against Georgia has a lot more at stake for the Bulldogs than it does the Gators.

University

Through Their Eyes: Part 2 - Into the light and out of the dark

By Melissa Gomez | Apr. 11, 2016

Metro

UF Department of Religion chair sentenced to probation, counseling

By Martin Vassolo | Apr. 11, 2016

A UF professor accused of spying on his underage adopted daughter was sentenced to five years of probation and at least 30 months of counseling.

University

Jane Goodall to speak at UF during semester's final Accent event

By Katelyn Newberg | Apr. 11, 2016

UF students can hear from a leading animal and environmental researcher April 20.

J.C. Deacon looks on during the 2016 SunTrust Invitational at the Mark Bostick Golf Course.

University

Florida men’s golf team preparing for SECs

By Ray Boone | Apr. 11, 2016

While golf fans around the world were captivated by the Masters on Sunday, the Florida men’s golf team was putting in practice time at the Mark Bostick Golf Course.

Maria Torres tees off during the 2015 SunTrust Gator Invitational at UF's Mark Bostick Golf Course.

Sports

Gators women's golf emphasizing consistency in lead-up to SEC Championship

By Alfredo Morales | Apr. 11, 2016

Yielding to pressure and losing focus can break a golfer, and after ending the regular season with a four-tournament winning streak, the pressure has mounted for Florida’s women’s golf team.

Fara, a 7-year-old golden retriever from Love on a Leash, was one of two dogs who visited students outside Library West during finals relaxation week.

University

UF brings horses, dogs for semesterly finals relaxation week

By Madeleine Haist | Apr. 11, 2016

Students can pet miniature horses outside of Library West on Thursday.

Trip, played by Ryan Golden, 19, hits on his ex-girlfriend Ashley, played by Marissa Secades, 19, at a party. The characters moved the audience to other spots in the Newins-Zeigler Hall Breezeway throughout the night as they followed the story of Ashley's sexual assault and the reactions from her friends and family.

University

Play brings attention to sexual assault survivors

By Chelsea Hansen | Apr. 11, 2016

A new UF play is showing how sexual assault impacts survivors and their loved ones.

Metro

UF professor talks 'Plight of the Honey Bee' at local event

By Molly Donovan | Apr. 11, 2016

About 100 people buzzed over a bee speaker Monday night.

Metro

Cat-saving project ahead of schedule

By Madison Behm | Apr. 11, 2016

Curiosity might have killed the cat, but the Million Cat Challenge is on a mission to save one million felines from all threats, curiosity and otherwise.

University

UF employees offered emotional wellness classes to help with relaxation

By Amanda DioGuardi | Apr. 11, 2016

UF and UF Health employees will have the opportunity to relax and de-stress through a new wellness classes.

Metro

Alachua County promotes bookmobiles during National Library Week

By Janiece Sebris | Apr. 11, 2016

The Alachua County Library District will commemorate mobile libraries as part of a larger celebration throughout the week.

University

UF alumnus gets full ride to Cambridge for Chinese history

By Jessica Rodriguez | Apr. 11, 2016

A UF alumnus will study Chinese history in London next Fall.

University

UF student to perform at national music festival

By Jessica Rodriguez | Apr. 11, 2016

A UF music student will play classical music such as Prokofiev’s “Romeo and Juliet” at a national festival this June.

Opinion

Editorial: Myths Un-Mythed - 'Sandy Hook shame'

Apr. 11, 2016

We live in a world full of myths. Never mind the tales of an undercover spy, or so-called “fairy” (likely Soviet-trained) sneaking into our children’s bedrooms to do Lord knows what with their precious teeth or the tales of a puppet hiding behind his nasal mutation to cover up his habitual dishonesty. No, we want to highlight supposedly truthful claims and offer a reminder of their unfounded foundations.