OPINION
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COLUMNS
Lost in the sauce: One last call for a swig of surrealism
By BILL O'CONNOR< | Aug. 1, 2011"Mike, join me in a pint of Guinness."
Opinion
OPINION
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COLUMNS
When businesses suck, let them know
By Shea Ford | Aug. 1, 2011A few days ago, I went to a McDonald's. My girlfriend and I ordered two sandwiches. The women at the window seemed, shall we say, less than thrilled to be working there.
OPINION
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EDITORIALS
Game of drones
By The Alligator Editorial Board | Aug. 1, 2011"The only thing dumber than a Republican or Democrat is when these pricks work together," Lewis Black once rambled in one of his acerbic comedic whippings of American society. He said, "We have a two-party system: The Democratic Party, which is a party of no ideas, and the Republican Party, which is a party of bad ideas. And the way it works is the Republican stands up in Congress and goes, ‘I GOT A REALLY BAD IDEA!' and the Democrat says, ‘AND I CAN MAKE IT SHITTIER!'"
OPINION
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EDITORIALS
Why should we have all the fun? Let's open it up
By The Alligator Editorial Board | Aug. 1, 2011We're going to try something different Thursday.
OPINION
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COLUMNS
Don't pass GOP, don't collect compromise
July 27, 2011The news these past couple of days has been an embarrassment to American politics.
OPINION
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EDITORIALS
Thank God for this guy
By The Alligator Editorial Board | July 27, 2011With all the utter stupidity and assclown-ity that has been allowed to run rampant in this town and university, let alone this country, it's incredibly easy to become jaded toward the Big Guy Upstairs. He's probably not that enthused either when he has to explain to other celestial beings that yes - He has to take credit for all his children, including the deadbeat ones who use emoticons in their everyday speech, wear Ed Hardy and actually think George Lopez is funny.
OPINION
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EDITORIALS
Landlords should be aware of students' needs
By The Alligator Editorial Board | July 27, 2011In the next few days, a good number of you will be fully immersed in one of the greatest pains in the backside known to man as you fire up your U-Hauls, break out the boxes and load up your arms with as much stuff as possible as you bid your apartments/houses/glorified shitholes farewell.
OPINION
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EDITORIALS
Death needs no label
By The Alligator Editorial Board | July 25, 2011Call it the end result of advertising bombing raids, product placements, logos, mottos, catchlines or an unholy alliance of all these things, but we as Americans have a never-ending hard-on for labeling things. Especially things that have no business being labeled. It doesn't matter if it's Coca-Cola or Grandpa's coke, we can find a way to slap a tag, banner or any overarching gimmick on anything to generate a quick buck or a web hit.
OPINION
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COLUMNS
Winehouse, weirdo & warlords - Oh my!
By Shea Ford | July 25, 2011What a busy week!
OPINION
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COLUMNS
The 'S' word: The avada kedavra of American political rhetoric
July 20, 2011If you live in the United States, then you've become accustomed to the logic-be-damned attempts to malign politicians and public policy through the use of fear and hate.
OPINION
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LETTERS TO THE EDITOR
Radical group does not accurately represent animal rights activism
By Jared Misner | July 20, 2011Sometimes we're mortified by our own kind. Today is one of those days.
OPINION
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EDITORIALS
Gator Growl band choice makes sense
By The Alligator Editorial Board | July 20, 2011Gator Growl got it right this time.
OPINION
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LETTERS TO THE EDITOR
Porn threatens society
By Sean Thau | July 18, 2011Having just celebrated our nation's birth, I thought that my fellow Americans should be alerted to one of the most dangerous activities destroying America today, causing personal heartache, moral decay and a weakening of the American spirit: Internet pornography.
OPINION
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COLUMNS
Hard times await America's 'Tot Mom'
By Shea Ford | July 18, 2011Casey Anthony is out and ready to party. Innocent or guilty, she had quite a favorable outcome and is free to do whatever she damn well pleases.
OPINION
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EDITORIALS
Facebook facepalm
By The Alligator Editorial Board | July 18, 2011We've all wondered whether our parents and even grandparents set up Facebook profiles to be more connected with us or to keep their eyes on us.
OPINION
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EDITORIALS
Haridopolos' political exit is a move Florida needed
By The Alligator Editorial Board | July 18, 2011And now we pause for a moment of silence to acknowledge the long-awaited death of the diseased politi-joke that was state Sen. Mike Haridopolos' legislative career.
OPINION
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EDITORIALS
Why you mad?
By The Alligator Editorial Board | July 13, 2011The saddest part about all of this? Not a sliver of surprise was felt by any of us.
OPINION
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EDITORIALS
Parking downtown should stay free
By The Alligator Editorial Board | July 13, 2011Saturday night at the club downtown could get a bit more expensive in the near future, and contrary to the city's hopes, we don't think that's going to attract more customers.
OPINION
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COLUMNS
Lost in the sauce: guy walks into the bar
By BILL O'CONNOR< | July 11, 2011I've been back from Vietnam for seven years. I spent the first three in a drunken New Orleans haze. The next four, I drove for Hoffa's Teamsters.
OPINION
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COLUMNS
ABC Family ad blitz: accio facepalm
By Shea Ford | July 11, 2011For those who are living in a cave and are unaware, the final Harry Potter film debuts in U.S. theaters Friday.
