Classic Comedy By Andrew Stanfill, Alligator Staff Feature photoAndrew Stanfill
Today's young adults are no longer out-learning their elders, according to a recent report from the American Council on Education, a group that represents colleges and universities in Washington, D.C.
No arrests have been made after a woman reported to Gainesville Police that she was sexually assaulted in her East Gainesville apartment Tuesday morning.
Great teams have it, struggling teams search for it.
Ann Brosius Gainesville resident, SG election poll worker
In a two-part Student Senate meeting that lasted about five hours, 46 new senators were sworn in and new Senate leaders were elected.
Rosie the tarantula crawled along Carl S. Barfield's left arm at a table on the Reitz Union Colonnade Tuesday.
During last week's Student Government elections, student voters overwhelmingly rejected the referendum to install hand scanners at Southwest Recreation Center. OK, they did more than reject the referendum. An 84 percent supermajority verbally scolded the hand scanners in front of their parents and bitchslapped the taste out of the scanners' mouths, all while peeing on the scanners' rug.
Anyone lobbying for a cause in Gainesville will soon be required to register with the city.
U.S. Congressman Cliff Stearns and his Democratic opponent still have not met.
Walking down to the 17th hole, UF assistant golf coach Steve Bradley had butterflies in his stomach. Imagine how Tim McKenney, who actually had to swing the club, felt.
Erik Nyberg, SFC student
Forget "Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus." Now, men are like microwave ovens, and women are like crock pots.
If there's such a thing as being fashionably late in college football, UF's offense has that party strategy down pat.
Ryan King, 4HH
Plans by the Regional Transit System to update its bus system could save time for riders.
Urban Meyer and Billy Donovan will flex their fundraising muscles this year for the sake of college affordability.
Celebrities in advertising are as common as Gainesville pool parties during the summer.
Two questions that appeared on the ballot in last week's Student Government election received popular responses from students, but the measures needed to turn the questions into action are uncertain.
Solutions by The State News
