Summer pool parties include beer, food, music, and girls in bikinis. What more could you ask for? Saturday seemed to be my lucky day, as Gainesville Place hosted its Summer A pool party.
Gators have a new reason to turn their jorts-swag on: UF students Rudy Mendoza, Calvin Cole, Tim Keck and Brian Amos won the title of Funniest Comedy Team at the National College Comedy Competition.
Sold in a small pouch clearly labeled “not intended for human consumption,” Gainesville Green Sense is marketed as an herbal air freshener. The finely crumbled blend of dry plant matter smells slightly sweet, similar to a fruity bubblegum.
When I told my editor I’d do a feature on a tranny prostitute, I sort of meant it as a joke.
You can’t describe summertime in Gainesville. You have to experience it – the 98- degree temperatures, 110 percent humidity, mosquitoes the size of cockroaches and sweat stains galore. It’s a time when even a brief walk to class leaves you with a swamp in your pants.
Summer is a hard time for sports fans. As the NBA and NHL playoffs come to a close, fans are left trying to subsist off of the meager pickings of summer sports.
The UF Stand Up Comedy Team has made it to the Funniest Four of The Rooftop Comedy National College Comedy Competition for the second consecutive year. The fabulous foursome are: Rudy “Glitter Machine” Mendoza, Calvin “Time Hooker” Cole, Tim “Shadow Box” Keck and Brian “New Guy” Amos.
"Functioning robots are all alike; every malfunctioning robot malfunctions in its own way."
Space. The final frontier. Where no one can hear you scream, and where everyone's favorite mustached avenger must return to once again save the princess on the back of a dinosaur-dragon and get a piece of that cake! Finally.
Want to learn how to grow weeds? Have you been itching to use your green thumb this summer? Then I'm here to tell you that it's not only easy, it's fun and affordable.
Dear readers, I have enjoyed my time so far serving as an Avenue columnist. By which, I mean that I enjoy getting my opinions and musings out there so I can entertain some bored students who just finished the crossword in the classifieds section. However, I will be taking my column in a different direction this time. Instead of entertaining you people with (mostly) true stories about being bored and anti-social, I will use my position as a semi-legitimate column writer to warn one and all about a very grave threat to our collective well-being: douchebags.
“If you want a revolution, the only solution: evolve, gotta evolve.”
“I drive a Honda Fit, which is ironic,” Chris Cope said.
Dust off your morals and pray for calamity. Ellis Amburn, former editor to the stars and author of seven biographies, is just one of the 30 writers coming to a workshop at the UF.
Just when the e-dust settled and pretty much everyone forgot what the “old Facebook” looked like, the unstoppable website did it again. The company’s new changes to profiles’ information section strip users of any sort of individuality and beg the question: Really?!
“You’re staying in Gainesville for the summer?” This is the last thing my friend said to me after I had finished helping him move out of his apartment a couple of weeks ago.
As the semester comes to a close, many students try to go out with a bang, while others, with a hit.
It’s five minutes until your next class. You have just come out of a three-hour-block and now have to run across campus to present a project. By the way, your stomach is growling.
For those of you left crying in your exam-induced state of self-hatred and last-minute studying, here’s what you might have missed in the entertainment realm.
Solutions by The State News
