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Thursday, April 25, 2024

It’s that time again.

While students all over Gainesville are focused on gathering textbooks and mapping their class routes to pass Starbucks, we at the Alligator are pulling out our hair and scrambling for staff.

Yes, we knew it was coming. Yes, we probably should have started our search earlier. But the fact is that we are desperately seeking students for every position imaginable. So come on over and bring your friends, neighbors, chinchilla or anyone else who’s interested to our open house Friday from 2 p.m. to 5 p.m. at 1105 W University Ave. — the old vine-covered building next to Karma Cream.

But Friday is a long time away — four more issues of the Alligator — so if you’re really excited, you can send resumes and samples to apply@alligator.org and start writing (or photographing, or cartooning, or doing handstands for our entertainment) immediately.

We have openings for an opinions editor, photographers, videographers, columnists, news writers, the Avenue writers, cartoonists, sports writers, graphic artists, copy editors, anyone who knows anything about Web sites, anyone who knows anything about anything, and anyone who knows nothing about anything. (Well, maybe not so much of the last one.)

That’s where you come in.

Whether your major is journalism, economics, political science, ballet or wearing lots of orange and blue, we want you to apply.

In fact, a certain opinions editor who is abandoning us for a fancy Washington, D.C., internship is an economics major. If he can write editorials, anyone can.

If you want to write news stories, we ask that you can form a sentence and be objective. If you want to be opinions editor or write for the opinions section, we ask that you be super opinionated and willing to keep up with what’s going on locally and/or nationally. If you want to do anything visual, we ask that you... have eyes. See? We’re very flexible.

As cheesy as it sounds, we really do want to represent the Student Body, and the best way we can do that is to pull our staff from all spectra of... well, the Student Body.

However, this job is not for the faint of heart. It requires work and dedication. We should also mention that you’ll spend most of your humble paycheck on coffee and food from the restaurants within walking distance of our office.

It’s true — we work five days a week and hardly get any sleep (there’s a big, comfy couch in the office), but we have fun. We decorate the office when it’s our co-workers birthdays, we make brownies, watch bad TV shows and eat a lot of Mexican food.

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If that’s not tempting, consider how great a job at the largest student-run paper in the U.S. will look on your resume. We’re also ranked eighth in the nation, in case you were wondering.

We offer a competitive salary, and your paycheck will exceed the wages of a stay-at-home mom, a migrant farmer and a soup kitchen volunteer.

Still not convinced?

Consider this: We aren’t above paying you in hugs and baked goods in addition to that big, fat paycheck.

Seriously though, we need you.

So if you’re confident, imagine 35,000 people reading your work every day. And if not, rest assured that most people only skim, anyway. Either way, you’ll be entertained by the crazies who call, e-mail, and, yes, even actually send letters about how outrageous and horrible we are.

So send us an e-mail now while you ride the bus to your next class (we know you all have smart phones).

Chelsea Keenan is the editor in chief and Emily Fuggetta is the managing editor/ print of the Independent Florida Alligator.

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