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Sunday, June 29, 2025

Opinion | Columns

Florida Alligator
OPINION  |  COLUMNS

How to master beauty and dominate your interactions

 Haven’t we all fallen in love? But what is love? Why do we get physically attracted to someone? Why do we consider someone pretty? What should we consider to be absolute beauty? You may find this surprising, but everything related to love and attraction is rooted in biology.


Florida Alligator
OPINION  |  COLUMNS

A methodical look at the nautical: SpongeBob

Let’s jump right into things, shall we? I’m just kidding. I never do that — jump into things, that is. I always ramble for the first few hundred words so I can release all my pent-up charm and wit. I just watched “Back to the Future” this weekend for the first time in a while.


Florida Alligator
OPINION  |  COLUMNS

Our fragile America needs repair, truth

The human being is a fragile specimen, subject to the prying hands of time. Our bodies endure much wear and tear: weather, injuries, inopportune falls. Bruises lay over the fine canvas of our skin, fading one day and returning the next. In enough time, should you allow such bruises to fester, they consume your existence.


Florida Alligator
OPINION  |  COLUMNS

For collegiate Floridians, hurricane parties are dangerous yet necessary

To this day, I’m still amazed by the colorful range of responses that an approaching hurricane will bring forth from Floridians. Non-native residents frantically plan for the looming apocalypse by stocking up on nonperishables, flashlights and bottled water. Concerned parents beg their college kids to stay indoors, avoid power lines and charge their cellphones.


Florida Alligator
OPINION  |  COLUMNS

The letdown of next time: not dwelling on the past

When I was very young, my father’s family (and by that I mean my immediate family, my grandparents, my aunt’s family and my father’s uncles’ families — a good chunk of my paternal side) would spend a few weeks in Montenegro, in the house where my grandfather and his brothers grew up. The house was built on a hill, and the lower level no longer belonged to our family. The other two levels and the guest house were divided among my grandfather and his two brothers.


Florida Alligator
OPINION  |  COLUMNS

How we are becoming ‘drunken peasants’ with extreme behaviors

As a college student, I have to say, one of the most intriguing behaviors I have noticed among my comrades is their rather libertarian philosophy. By libertarian, I mean specifically the social ethos that preaches, “If it feels good, do it.” I am curious: Where did this philosophy come from? I think past generations bullied people who lived by the creed we hold dear; in fact, they created a name for them: hippies. And what were the hippies but a group of cultural rebels, openly revolting against the conservative Christian traditions and norms of their parents with a jovial hedonism? It seems, then, our most cherished philosophy blossomed from the seeds of rebellion. What can account for this pattern?


Florida Alligator
OPINION  |  COLUMNS

Sex with an ex: reflections and lessons from going back to that special person

Last Spring, I was crushing on a bespectacled girl with green hair in my European literature class. I asked her out on a Wednesday, and she told me she had a boyfriend. I felt terribly sorry for myself the rest of the day. I got home and furiously moped to The Smiths in my bedroom for several hours. Then I moved to scribbling short stanzas of melodramatic verse, like: “Your hair is greener than the grass I want to lie in with you while we f---.”


Florida Alligator
OPINION  |  COLUMNS

Column: Saying goodbye to Gawker and mainstream anarchist journalism

For the last week, the scandal that plagued Gawker.com has remained silent, its front page littered with parting words from editors and writers alike. Their headlines include, “How Guilty Should I Feel?” “Gawker Was Murdered by Gaslight,” and “What Was Gawker?” These final articles read like obituaries, mourning the impending shutdown of a site that, according to Gawker.com writer Hamilton Nolan, was, “anarchist journalism at it’s finest.”


Florida Alligator
OPINION  |  COLUMNS

Column: A conch shell of its former self, SpongeBob

You’ve seen “SpongeBob SquarePants,” right? There’s, like, no way you haven’t. I’m pretty confident in saying it defined a generation — that’s not too far-fetched. “SpongeBob SquarePants” was a show filled with wit, character and charm. The comedy was smart despite its status as a children’s show, so we look back on it with warm regard rather than just with nostalgia goggles. But, its quality has declined in past years; the show is really a conch shell of its former self, and it’s something I’d like to analyze.


Florida Alligator
OPINION  |  COLUMNS

Column: In tennis, ‘Love’ means… absolutely nothing

For those of you who are not acquainted with how we philosophy majors behave, let me familiarize you: Have you ever met someone who argues simply because they can? This weekend I was sitting with some fellow philosophy undergraduates in our natural habitat, a sanitarily adequate dive bar, talking about "college relationships." Are they superficial? Do they contribute to the development of maturity? As Hillary Clinton’s social-media intern would ask, “WTF is up wit dat lol #ImWitHurrrr.”


Florida Alligator
OPINION  |  COLUMNS

Column: Are presidential polls legitimate?

Let’s face it: People are impatient. And as the future’s chances of significantly changing people’s lives increases, the more impatient people become. Election results in November could push, or violently shove, America in the wrong direction for the next four years, which is why Americans look to presidential polls for a glimpse into what the future holds. The problem is that presidential polls are becoming as legitimate as the candidates themselves.


Florida Alligator
OPINION  |  COLUMNS

Guest: Help our earth: Reduce your use of plastics

A widely known article, “The Tragedy of Commons,” written by Garrett Hardin, is used in many fields to analyze human behavior. The tragedy is an economic problem that occurs when individuals exploit a common or shared resource. As a result, the demand overwhelms supply, and the resource becomes unavailable to other groups. Individuals neglect the well-being of the group in pursuit of personal gain without regard for others; individuals benefit in the short-term but the group loses in the long run. This situation has implications for the use of resources, sustainability and the depletion of nonrenewable resources. And all of these factors coalesce in the grand catastrophe our generation faces: global warming — the increase of Earth’s average surface temperature due to a ton of emissions or pollutants, like carbon dioxide emissions from the production and incineration of plastic bags.


Florida Alligator
OPINION  |  COLUMNS

Column: A strain between Iran and Russia, What does it mean?

Last week, Iran and Russia reached a historic agreement that allowed Russia to launch military strikes from Iranian bases in order to “fight terrorism” and continue propping up the Assad regime. Considering no foreign military has operated from Iran since World War II, this was a considerable step forward for Russia and, as I see it, a considerable step backward for the millions of Syrians on the ground who feel firsthand the brunt of Assad’s regime. A Russia more involved in Iran and Syria is bad for everyone.


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