Darts & Laurels 7/31/14
July 30, 2014Today, we’re celebrating the end of July with a hello-August-please-don’t-be-s****y edition of
Today, we’re celebrating the end of July with a hello-August-please-don’t-be-s****y edition of
Throughout the school year, students are rewarded for their hard work with occasional breaks from the rigors of academia. Following the grueling ends of each semester, we are released from the clutches of term papers, exams and presentations to spend a few precious weeks relaxing and recharging our batteries.
Summers in Florida mean outfits that contain as few articles of clothing as possible.
You walk into a restaurant at 6:55 p.m. in anticipation of your 7 p.m. date. When 7:10 p.m. approaches, there is no sign of your date. And when you cautiously pick up the phone to call, there is no answer. You wait a little longer and call again. Someone picks up the phone, and within a mere second, the call is ended.
Unless you’re a TV-less hipster (getting all your shows on Hulu/Netflix/HBO Go — yeah, we’re on to you), you’ve been bombarded with the predictable mud-flinging political ads as November elections draw closer and closer. As they’d have you believe, Rick Scott is a reptilian warlord in a human skin suit, and Charlie Crist is a slick turncoat pushing for education cuts.
America must come to grips with an uncomfortable reality: Our world influence is beginning to wane. The two main crises that have dominated the airwaves for the past few weeks, the Malaysian Airline downed by Russian-backed Ukrainian separatist forces and the latest chapter in the Israeli-Palestinian conflict, have made this development perfectly clear. We have overstretched, overreached and overplayed our influence for too long.
As late July turns to August, a few events are certain: Fall semester starts in just four short weeks, Gator football kicks off and the home stretch 2014 election begins. With the election looming, along with the glut of negative advertising, constant phone calls, campaign emails and fundraising requests, it’s time we broach a serious topic.
Get ready: Here’s your summer-sex-scandal-special edition of...
For a brief moment at the end of last week, it seemed that Florida would claim a victory in the fight for gay rights. On Thursday, Monroe County Circuit Court Judge Luis Garcia overturned Florida’s 2008 ban on gay marriage and ordered that the two men who appealed for a marriage license, along with all other gay couples, be allowed to wed.
Call me a traditionalist, but I don’t normally take sex advice from Greek life-inspired websites.
“But Jesus said, ‘Let the little children come to me and do not hinder them, for to such belongs the kingdom of heaven.’” Matthew 19:14.
Because the political right is full of an interesting bunch of characters, many in the media struggle to properly identify and categorize its different ideological camps. The right is said to be made up of mainstream, business-friendly, Tea Party, libertarian, neoconservative, religious-minded or simply extremist groups.
Let’s not be distracted by the hype. At the heart of the recent Hobby Lobby Supreme Court decision, the issue was solely about power. The majority decision, delivered by Justice Samuel Alito, and even the oral arguments from Hobby Lobby, instead tried to cloak the corporation’s discriminatory, anti-woman, anti-family practice of denying to cover certain birth control methods under the Religious Freedom Restoration Act of 1993. Since corporations are currently granted “personhood” under the law, the rights of corporations now officially seem to outweigh those of women.
Tuesday’s Alligator column voiced misconceptions regarding the situation between the Palestinian Authority and Israel. The real problem is not Israel, but Hamas.
We hate to start Darts & Laurels off on a bad note, but animal cruelty is something this editorial board passionately stands against. Two Clay County girls are being investigated by Florida law enforcement officers after they posted a video of themselves burning a Gopher tortoise and torturing it to death. The Gopher tortoise, which is an endangered species in Florida, was lit on fire several times as the girls filmed it and said things like: “Burn baby, burn baby,” and “Now you’re scared of us, huh?” The girls also repeatedly threw it against the concrete and stomped on it, crushing its shell.
Florida and Georgia are rivals on a sizable scale. The annual football game between UF and the University of Georgia in Jacksonville can resemble preparations for a large war between two enemies, but it seems that the two rivals have more in common than we think.
It’s easy to forget, what with daily strange Gawker headlines and a certain highly anticipated magical theme park opening, that Florida wildlife is in danger. From rising sea levels threatening the southern coast to black bears ransacking neighborhood trash as a result of overdevelopment to Big Oil drilling in the Everglades, Florida’s natural resources are under attack.
It’s 8:37 a.m. when you wake up and look around, thinking, “Wait, that Southern Tide poster isn’t mine. Whose room is this?”
In “The Odyssey,” Odysseus must avoid the mythical sirens who lure sailors to their doom on the rocky shoreline of their island. Though the songstresses are enticing, Odysseus and his crew, with the assistance of some beeswax with which they filled their ears, force themselves to ignore the dangerous distraction in order to preserve their best interest.
The situation in Palestine that has taken place over the past four weeks has brought us to speak out against the unjust collective punishment being levied on the Palestinians by the state of Israel.