Whether it was the time I spent in New York, summer’s natural lack of intellectual stimulation, or my inherent love for mindless reality shows, I now find myself relating all aspects of life to the MTV hit show “Jersey Shore.”
Tyler: To start from the top, obviously Urban Meyer is Don Draper.
I’ve got some advice for freshmen.
Welcome to UF. You are now a student at the flagship academic institution of the state of Florida. With a University of Florida degree, you have endless career opportunities and a promising shot at some of the nation’s top graduate programs.
UF is a big place, and as your unofficial welcoming committee, we’re going to pass along a few tips to help you incoming freshman get accommodated a little quicker than we did.
To: The UF Freshmen and Transfer Students
Welcome to the University of Florida and The Gator Nation!
Welcome to Florida. Take out your notebook, grab a pen and get ready to take your first class because I’m about to drop some knowledge on the incoming freshmen.
The best response to being asked how you will replace a two-time-national-champion, Heisman-trophy-winning quarterback whose likeness is being constructed into a statue in the very location you are asked to replace him:
Let’s pretend your high school refused to release your grades to universities across the country.
Welcome to Year 1, A.T.
Freedom is an addictive thing, isn’t it? Each time we get a little bit more freedom to do anything, regardless of the positive or negative impacts, we cling to it like a mother clinging to her newly born baby. It is our baby. It is our everything. But why is this so? Why do we find it so difficult to let go of any kind of freedom? I would put my hard-earned Monopoly money on the reason being a human tendency, to grasp onto anything that enables us to express ourselves. Since expression can be quasi-defined as life, the opportunity to live to one’s fullest potential, which I believe is infinite, can be equated as freedom.
The Gators open up their preseason training camp today, and that can only mean one thing around these parts: UF fans already have their eyes on a trip to Glendale, Ariz., in January.
This long, hot and boring summer is finally coming to a close, and after all the dreadfully boring news that came out in the past few months, we think it should have come a lot sooner.
In Tuesday’s Alligator, the Editorial Board took a strong stance in favor of adding more Gainesville utility providers, finally bringing the free market to our power and water and working to stop the city-controlled socialists at GRU. Frankly, I couldn’t agree more.
We have about 80 years to live, and about one-third of that we spend unconscious. And I don’t mean because of an accumulation of hard nights at Midtown. Throw in work, education, eating, daily household and personal hygiene chores, and the roughly five years everyone spends in a line of some sort just waiting for something like a red light to turn green.
Gainesville Mayor Craig Lowe hasn’t wasted any time coming out in protest of Dove World Outreach Center’s plans for a Quran burning on Sept. 11.
The Southeastern Conference just got tougher and deeper.
As a Christian, I follow a basic commandment: Love one another as you love yourself. This does not mean love your Christian neighbors, and bully all others. It definitely does not mean that it is acceptable, in the name of Christ, to persecute those of another faith. On Sept. 11, The Dove World Outreach Center is planning an “International Burn a Quran Day.” They describe Islam as “a religion of the devil” and have been mobilizing using Facebook and YouTube to persuade others to their cause.
Jersey Shore: Two words that ignite controversy, YouTube impersonations and fist pumps.
Solutions by The State News
