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Friday, July 18, 2025

El Caimán

Florida Alligator
THE AVENUE  |  FASHION

Don't be a fashion 'don't'

I'll bet your mother told you a lot of things when she was teaching you how to dress: Don't wear white after Labor Day, match your shoes to your purse, wear everything in moderation. But did it ever occur to you that maybe your mom was wrong? Well, not wrong so much as dated. Mom grew up in another time period all together. And grandma? Doubly true. So I think it's time to go back, reanalyze those cardinal fashion sins and decide which ones need to be cast aside.


Florida Alligator
THE AVENUE  |  MUSIC

Album review: Ben Folds - "Way To Normal"

"Oh, that stupid bitch is mine." Now before you make any snap judgments, know that this line comes from a song called "Errant Dog." Get it? It's funny - or at least Ben Folds thinks so. On "Way To Normal," Nashville's longest-running jokester walks the fine line between kitschy fun and tasteless humor with twelve politically incorrect songs designed to challenge the gag reflex. "The Frown Song" and "Dr. Yang" play like dumbed-down, cheesed-up New Pornographers outtakes - frenetic, hyper-pop of the most hummable order. "Bitch Went Nuts" uses the phrase in a more conventional sense and adds a shot of gratuitous profanity for good measure. Call it a guilty pleasure if you'd like - the track has more hooks than a fishing charter. Get it? Hooks? Fishing charter? Ben would think it's funny.


Florida Alligator
THE AVENUE  |  MUSIC

Album review: Jenny Lewis - "Acid Tongue"

Innocence is like a dollar bill in a busted vending machine: Once it's gone, you aren't getting it back. So Jenny Lewis, whose up-until-now enduring image was that of a blue polka-dotted Southern belle, might as well kiss her Dorothy-esque appeal goodbye. "Acid Tongue" gets its title from the line, "I've been down to Dixie and dropped acid on my tongue." A thousand clean-cut boys in Middle America have just lost their princess. Freed from the burden of virtue, the prodigal daughter blossoms in this den of foot-tapping hell-fire. In "The Next Messiah," her sultry voice slithers atop bluesy guitars when a male voice chimes in: "I'm gonna give my love to you on a day you gotta bring it back." Our little girl is a full-grown tramp.


Florida Alligator
THE AVENUE  |  MUSIC

Album review: Pussycat Dolls - "Doll Domination"

Catwoman, Hello Kitty, Yusuf Islam - whether through black spandex, lunch boxes or folk music, each of these feline enthusiasts have made meaningful contributions to the rich landscape of American pop culture. But not the Pussycat Dolls, who, with "Doll Domination," continue to claw their way through the ranks of tightly clothed MTV inventions with high-cut skirts and lowbrow R&B. "Bottle Pop" features some typically smooth lines from Snoop Dogg, and there's also a song called "I Hate This Part" - the girls showcase their command of irony. A little piece of my soul withered away when I heard this album. Still, this kind of music can't kill the Pussycats - they have nine lives.


Florida Alligator
OPINION  |  COLUMNS

Baby boomers the real ‘Me’ generation

It only took hours to work out the bailouts of Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac - a deal that increased the national debt by $5 trillion. You, me and our unborn children now owe the world's lenders our own little piece of a $14 trillion debt, give or take a couple hundred billion. Here is the kicker: We didn't borrow a dime.


Florida Alligator
NEWS  |  CAMPUS STUDENT GOVERNMENT

Voters swamp the polls

About 300 students waited outside the Orange & Brew to hear results of Student Government elections early Thursday morning, but the results were not made available by press time because votes were still being counted by the Supervisor of Elections.


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