This Valentine’s Day, love is in the air — and on the web.
With the rise of social media, the relationship-forward holiday has become increasingly digital.
While Valentine’s Day’s digitalization has the potential to positively impact relationships, it can also create false expectations of reality, according to Rachel Rodgers, a psychology professor at Northeastern University. Her research specializes in social media and how it impacts body image.
“You can’t tell the nature of someone’s relationship just by looking at them,” Rodgers said.
Many images online are curated to look a certain way, she said, or they could be edited or synthesized. In other words, she said, social media is a presentation — a marketing venture with the goal of making people want something.
While it’s possible for positive emotions to arise from seeing someone else’s social media post, negative emotions are the more frequent outcome since they drive users to continue interacting with content, she said.
“Positive emotions don’t keep you engaged with something,” Rodgers said.
Social media can create unreasonable expectations for people about what relationships are supposed to look like, she said. When seeing a happy couple online, one may be prompted to think about their own relationship, lifestyle and how they present themselves.
Social media usage is connected to depression, especially in adolescents, according to a study done by the National Institute of Health.
Rodgers added that social media pushes consumerist habits, especially during the holidays. For instance, a gift could become twice as expensive around Valentine’s Day due to online pressure to buy bigger, she said.
“Social media coverage just provides another layer of those consumerist pleasures,” Rodgers said. “You can’t buy happiness.”
How students feel
Gabriel Wong, a 19-year-old UF computer science junior, said he thinks it's important for people in a relationship to post each other online.
“It’s kind of a public commitment,” Wong said. “I think it’s nice to show off your partner and share your life and experiences together because social media is all about that.”
Wong and his partner post monthly recaps of each other for anniversaries and other events, he said.
While some people may see relationship content online and feel lonely, it’s all about how one views it, Wong said. Prior to his relationship, seeing friends post their partners online made him feel hopeful for when he would start a relationship of his own.
Social media is a good way for people to celebrate Valentine’s Day even if they don’t have a partner, he said. One popular example he mentioned is Galentine’s Day, an unofficial occasion where women celebrate their friendships with one another.
A survey by the relationship app Paired revealed most people between 18-44 years old say there is an “unspoken expectation,” to post about Valentine’s Day.
Angelina Le, a 20-year-old UF business administration junior, plans to post a little of what she and her boyfriend are doing on Valentine’s Day online, but not too much.
“I’m more of a private person, so I’m not all too big on showing off,” Le said. “When I see that on social media, it makes me uncomfortable.”
While she wants to show her family and close friends her Valentine’s Day plans, she doesn’t expect her boyfriend to do the same, she said.
“I think maybe other couples expect that,” Le said. “I think it’s completely up to him if he wants to post.”
Social media can create false expectations for Valentine’s Day, she said, and some people may feel the need to compare their experience with what they see online.
“It could definitely create some jealousy or negative thoughts,” Le said. “It becomes like a trap.”
Anna Kennedy, a 20-year-old UF natural resource conservation sophomore, doesn’t think being posted online is an important aspect in every relationship. However, she likes both being posted by her partner and sharing photos of him or the two of them together.
“If one person posts and the other doesn’t, then I guess it just feels weird,” Kennedy said.
Posting updates about one’s life or partner has become the norm, she said.
“Sometimes it can have a negative effect for sure, especially for people who may have gotten broken up with or don’t have a partner on Valentine’s Day,” Kennedy said. “But I think overall it’s a nice, positive thing to share.”
Kennedy said she thinks a lot of people get caught up in how other people perceive them, leading to overly extravagant Valentine’s Day celebrations for posts. For some people, like herself, smaller celebrations are more enjoyable.
Contact Leona Masangkay at lmasangkay@alligator.org. Follow them on X @leo_amasangkay.
Leona is a second-year journalism student and the Spring 2025 University Administration reporter. They previously worked as the Santa Fe reporter. In their free time, Leona enjoys going to the gym, watching Marvel movies and traveling the country for music festivals.
