I gulp a frosty mug of Pabst, wink at Gerry and ask, "Hey Hank, when are you going to start serving blacks in here?"
Softball teams around the country should be taking notes. Coach Tim Walton has built a superpower in Gainesville.
Since assuming office in January, Gov. Rick Scott has taken every step possible to pander to corporate interests at the expense of Florida's working class.
"Wait ‘til you try this. You won't believe it."
Do you ever wake up in the morning, look in the mirror and declare to the world how remarkably awesome you are?
The Philadelphia Phillies sport R2C2. The Miami Heat roll with Three 6 Mafia. The No. 6 Gators baseball team has Lou Pearlman and his throng of boy bands.
As I was placing my weekly necessities on the conveyor belt at Sweetbay one morning, I glanced at the magazines begging for my attention in front of me. Of course, I noticed the emaciated, indeterminate women on the covers and was forced to wonder, "Are these people even real?" Actually, with today's photo manipulation, they often are not.
Spring football practice is over, so they tell me. And the Orange and Blue Debut came and went unspectacularly.
Editor's Note: Across the world, millions struggle with addiction to alcohol and drugs. These are the stories, as best as he can remember them, of one of those compulsive personalities.
They're really obscure. You've probably never heard of them.
About two years ago, I decided to do what millions of college-aged kids have done since the days when Jesus and the Dirty Dozen toured as a traveling family band: print out a resume, put on the greatest pseudo-smile Monopoly money can buy and apply for a job.
In a month’s time, Titletown U.S.A. — or just Gainesville as the rest of the country refers to it — could be drowning in hardware once again. Florida athletics are at an all-time high. Any number of teams could bring a championship back to The Gator Nation.
"Hey man, aren't you from New York? A plane just hit the World Trade Center."
During my four long years of college, I developed a least favorite question.
Sports weren’t always a passion of mine.
Anything to relieve stress: It’s scotch and smokes one night, the gym the next.
Here’s the situation: Your exam is on Saturday and, let’s be honest, you never actually watched those Statistics lectures. You did most of the quizzes, attended various labs and it’s all coming down to a careful calculation that says you must score at least an 85 on the final for a B in the class. What’s the game plan? Wouldn’t it be nice if there were a pill that gave you a super brain blast allowing for hours of cramming without any of the pain? Forget getting a B, this pill would let you score high enough on the final to reach a nearly-impossible A. Well, that pill exists. In fact, many of those pills exist, and they go by various names such as Adderall, Vyvanse and Ritalin. The day is finally here, folks. Tomorrow marks the end of the 2010-2011 school year at UF, and the light at the end of the tunnel is so bright it’s almost blinding. Freshmen like me end our first year of college while seniors bid their college years adieu. For all of us, however, one pesky word separates us from our summers, and it starts with an F and ends with INALS. Library West is braced for stuffing to max capacity, and Starbucks has stocked its strongest espressos. No. 2 pencils at the ready UF; it’s finals time. How will you navigate these treacherous waters?
What a difference a year can bring.
“I am fiscally conservative but socially liberal.”
“Hey you, Spartacus. Take it outside, asshole.”
Solutions by The State News
