Opinions - The Independent Florida Alligator

OPINION | EDITORIALS

Thank God for this guy

By The Alligator Editorial Board | July 27, 2011

With all the utter stupidity and assclown-ity that has been allowed to run rampant in this town and university, let alone this country, it's incredibly easy to become jaded toward the Big Guy Upstairs. He's probably not that enthused either when he has to explain to other celestial beings that yes - He has to take credit for all his children, including the deadbeat ones who use emoticons in their everyday speech, wear Ed Hardy and actually think George Lopez is funny.

OPINION | EDITORIALS

Landlords should be aware of students' needs

By The Alligator Editorial Board | July 27, 2011

In the next few days, a good number of you will be fully immersed in one of the greatest pains in the backside known to man as you fire up your U-Hauls, break out the boxes and load up your arms with as much stuff as possible as you bid your apartments/houses/glorified shitholes farewell.

OPINION | EDITORIALS

Death needs no label

By The Alligator Editorial Board | July 25, 2011

Call it the end result of advertising bombing raids, product placements, logos, mottos, catchlines or an unholy alliance of all these things, but we as Americans have a never-ending hard-on for labeling things. Especially things that have no business being labeled. It doesn't matter if it's Coca-Cola or Grandpa's coke, we can find a way to slap a tag, banner or any overarching gimmick on anything to generate a quick buck or a web hit.

OPINION | COLUMNS

Winehouse, weirdo & warlords - Oh my!

By Shea Ford | July 25, 2011

What a busy week!

OPINION | COLUMNS

The 'S' word: The avada kedavra of American political rhetoric

July 20, 2011

If you live in the United States, then you've become accustomed to the logic-be-damned attempts to malign politicians and public policy through the use of fear and hate.

OPINION | LETTERS TO THE EDITOR

Radical group does not accurately represent animal rights activism

By Jared Misner | July 20, 2011

Sometimes we're mortified by our own kind. Today is one of those days.

OPINION | EDITORIALS

Gator Growl band choice makes sense

By The Alligator Editorial Board | July 20, 2011

Gator Growl got it right this time.

OPINION | LETTERS TO THE EDITOR

Porn threatens society

By Sean Thau | July 18, 2011

Having just celebrated our nation's birth, I thought that my fellow Americans should be alerted to one of the most dangerous activities destroying America today, causing personal heartache, moral decay and a weakening of the American spirit: Internet pornography.

OPINION | COLUMNS

Hard times await America's 'Tot Mom'

By Shea Ford | July 18, 2011

Casey Anthony is out and ready to party. Innocent or guilty, she had quite a favorable outcome and is free to do whatever she damn well pleases.

OPINION | EDITORIALS

Facebook facepalm

By The Alligator Editorial Board | July 18, 2011

We've all wondered whether our parents and even grandparents set up Facebook profiles to be more connected with us or to keep their eyes on us.

OPINION | EDITORIALS

Haridopolos' political exit is a move Florida needed

By The Alligator Editorial Board | July 18, 2011

And now we pause for a moment of silence to acknowledge the long-awaited death of the diseased politi-joke that was state Sen. Mike Haridopolos' legislative career.

OPINION | EDITORIALS

Why you mad?

By The Alligator Editorial Board | July 13, 2011

The saddest part about all of this? Not a sliver of surprise was felt by any of us.

OPINION | EDITORIALS

Parking downtown should stay free

By The Alligator Editorial Board | July 13, 2011

Saturday night at the club downtown could get a bit more expensive in the near future, and contrary to the city's hopes, we don't think that's going to attract more customers.

OPINION | COLUMNS

Lost in the sauce: guy walks into the bar

By BILL O'CONNOR< | July 11, 2011

I've been back from Vietnam for seven years. I spent the first three in a drunken New Orleans haze. The next four, I drove for Hoffa's Teamsters.

OPINION | COLUMNS

ABC Family ad blitz: accio facepalm

By Shea Ford | July 11, 2011

For those who are living in a cave and are unaware, the final Harry Potter film debuts in U.S. theaters Friday.

OPINION | EDITORIALS

That ain't right

By The Alligator Editorial Board | July 11, 2011

When a 168-year-old British tabloid read by millions goes down in the flames, we have to say something.

OPINION | COLUMNS

Unity among Americans should last longer than one day in July

July 6, 2011

On Monday, we recognized a day of legendary bravery in an onerous battle for life, liberty and happiness. We put aside our political persuasions and forgot our delusions of enmity. For a brief moment, we all had long hair, figuratively sang "Imagine" by John Lennon and did indeed "live as one."

OPINION | EDITORIALS

A pissing contest like no other: My encounter with Rick Scott

By C.J. Pruner | July 6, 2011

Last Thursday, my good buddy/managing editor/the-man-who-has-the-sense-to-never-let-me-run-a-Muhammad-cartoon Joey Flechas and I drove down to St. Petersburg for the annual Florida Press Association convention. For the few of you who don't religiously follow the inner workings of Florida print media, the FPA convention is where a bunch of godless leftist journos/"media academics"/anyone with a hard-on for the written word from all across the state gather at some palace of a hotel, dress up in outfits picked out by Stevie Wonder and try to outstroke each other in rhetorical masturbation. Essentially, it's like the Republican National Convention with the exception that there's a limit to how much free booze you can guzzle.

OPINION | EDITORIALS

Casey Anthony trial doesn't make you a legal expert

By The Alligator Editorial Board | July 6, 2011

If you're looking for some sense of validation as to whether your expert hunch that Casey Marie Anthony is innocent or guilty, seek life elsewhere.

OPINION | COLUMNS

Lost in the sauce: getting bug-eyed in the opium jungles

By BILL O'CONNOR< | July 4, 2011

My Thai friend Sith starts a lot of sentences with "Maybe America have, maybe America no have."