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Thursday, April 18, 2024

Today, gift your boo things they’ll truly cherish during these cold times: wool socks and a tankard of brandy.

On the serious, for all you lovebirds out and about today celebrating the fleeting connection you’ve made in a vast and unfeeling universe, hats off to you — we’re not bitter or anything. Just kidding; enjoy the holiday, you crazy kids. To all you single folks, don’t despair: All the chocolate goes on sale tomorrow, and at least you have more Olympic coverage to look forward to. Revel in the array of figure-skating butts, skiing butts and speed-skating butts as they fly past on your TV screen encased in skin-tight athletic wear. It’s the reason for the season.

Here it is, Valentines: Your love-is-in-the-air-no-wait-that’s-just-freezing-rain edition of…

Darts & Laurels

Two new pieces of legislation could lift a serious burden from student veterans: The House of Representatives unanimously voted to pass the GI Tuition Fairness Act, which would require all public universities to offer in-state tuition to veterans. Florida schools do not waive out-of-state fees for veteran students, so another bill currently making its rounds in the Florida State Senate would change that. So this week, we’re handing off a step-in-the-right-direction LAUREL to Senate Bill 84, which, if signed into law, would ensure out-of-state student veterans can get affordable rates for a UF education.

This week, Voldemort stand-in and Florida Gov. Rick Scott angered many when the state legislature excluded educational facilities from its list of possible early-voting locations — which, for us, means the Reitz Union won’t become an early-voting location any time soon.

According to Alligator coverage from earlier this week, “‘The statute allows early voting to occur in government-owned community centers,” (Sen. Bill) Nelson said. ‘The last time I checked, the university is part of the public sector, which is a community facility that is not just used by students.’”

The exclusion seems to be a calculated measure to suppress student voting; in the 2012 presidential elections, young voters overwhelmingly preferred Barack Obama to Mitt Romney. This week, we’re tossing a we-want-to-vote-early-and-buy-Starbucks-in-the-same-building DART to the Florida Legislature.

We reported Wednesday that the City of Gainesville is modifying intersections and speed limits around town to promote biker safety. Although the cost of the citywide accommodations for bike riders was pretty hefty — about $29,000 — we agree that cyclist safety is paramount for the many UF students, faculty and Gainesville residents who choose to cut costs and carbon emissions. An I-want-to-ride-my-bicycle-bicycle-bicycle-bicycle LAUREL goes to the Gainesville Public Works department this week.

Finally, a don’t-try-to-be-a-hero DART to all the sickly students and coughing co-workers who came to school/work anyway despite having colds. Seriously, everyone and his or her mother is sick in Gainesville right now — the Alligator newsroom was basically a hospital ward this week. Listen to your bodies and stay home when you’re feeling sniffly, guys.

OK, the mom rant is over.

Happy Valentine’s Day, Gators!

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[A version of this editorial ran on page 6 on 2/14/2014 under the headline "Darts & Laurels"]

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