Get out the polka-dot bikinis and bottles of grain alcohol - The Department of Darts & Laurels officially declares Spring Break 2009 open for business.
For those of you who don't know me, or for those of you who I have offended, I apologize if you took the meaning of my column to be anything but satire. As an effective satire only mirrors reality, I stand by what I have written for a few reasons.
It is no secret to anyone (except maybe Florida State economics students) that the economy is in its worst state in years.
On Wednesday morning, the entire editorial staff of the Daily Emerald - the student-produced newspaper at the University of Oregon - went on strike in protest of the attempts of its board of directors to install a publisher with unprecedented control over the newsroom.
I am not about to resort to the name-calling that Spanky from the Little Rascals, or a certain journalism-and-German junior at UF for that matter, would employ as his first response to a female threatening his self-proclaimed territory.
Bipartisanship is a dream; a glorious fantasy thought up by politicians who wanted to turn the public against their opponents. In all practicality, it doesn't exist.
Perhaps the understatement of the year would be to say that we live in a time of economic uncertainty.
Wednesday night in Starkville, Miss., a small city that just 24,000 people call home, the UF men's basketball team's season died quietly in its sleep.
Before Carrie Bradshaw, there was Barbara Millicent Roberts. She turns 50 years old this week, and she's never looked better.
No news isn't necessarily good news.
It's hard to see it behind her meek smile.
I was once informed that the only way to gain a clear understanding of a political group or a movement is to hear what one of their die-hard partisans has to say on the subject.
Joshua Nederveld is a chauvinistic, pea-for-a-brain, wannabe meathead. As a woman who regularly uses the bench (with her measly 70 pounds), I am outraged by his delusional "unwritten laws" of the weight room.
The word out of Washington reveals new information surrounding the destruction of CIA interrogation tapes that feature two al-Qaida suspects.
The sap is rising on campuses nationwide, as evidenced by "brahsome" plans of impending debauchery and the giggly expectation of blackouts yet to be wistfully forgotten.
March is finally here, and that means three wonderful things have arrived: Spring Break, March Madness and Spring Training.
My father once explained to me the importance of good timing in relationships. "Never talk to women when they're angry," he told me one night as he plopped on the couch with a blanket and pillow.
I want to commend the work the United We Dream at UF Campaign has done in the past week. I believe the Development, Relief and Education for Alien Minors Act (the DREAM Act) is of great importance because it will resolve the tragic irony that occurs in America.
This weekend I went to a rally organized by the Florida Education Association, Florida's largest educators' union, in support of full and sustainable funded public education in our state.
My gym partner and I have been pretty consistent this semester, and as lifting heavy weights is only a passing distraction for me, I take almost every opportunity I can get to people watch. I've noticed a disturbing trend: A divide exists between male and female gym-goers.
Solutions by The State News
